Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Sunny side up!

Bollywood has new talent. And the lovers of serious, or at least seriously entertaining, cinema  now have hope. Very expressive hope. Going by the internet stats on number of searches of bollywood celebrities, the clear, undisputed queen of inquest ( internet-quest, not to be mistaken with incest), goes by the name of Sunny Leone. Tadaaaa!

We are the fastest growing economy of the world. And really fast too. You know, like when during our school days, guys used to categorise the girls "This one is a behenjee ( a nun - colloquial translation ), but this one is really fast." Yup, that kind of fast. We are now open to receiving....whatever we get. And now that we know that we do have an 'open' reputation, we also don't mind enjoying it every bit.

So, Sunny Leone, welcome aboard the ship of frigid chics and demanding d****. You are bound to holler up a storm here and have everyone running for cover. Literal or otherwise. Not that we haven't had thaw material like you in the past. But they were not as lucky as you. Look what happened to Kimi Katkar, Mandakini and Mamta Kulkarni. They all went down the hall of shame, rather inconsolably. Despite their innocent looks and noble intentions, they were shown their place in tinsel town. Could they ever imagine the glory that you have received; or the status that has been thrust upon you so adoringly? Please don't take this personally, Sunny. I am quite a fan of your 'woman of substance' proclamation. And why not? You have served hungry and starved mankind all over the world.

As if life already wasn't difficult enough for the average Indian housewife, we now have you. The beginning of a new end. The shining star on the horizon which is already causing inglorious flares in many a household, stuck in a sexless marriage. And you may also be the mascot, as also the bleeding martyr, for the cause of legalised prostitution in India. If Thailand can, Bhailand can too.

All said and done, the business of cosmetic as well as prosthetic surgery in India, is sure to boom now. Can't alter the shape of your breasts? Boom! Here's a fresh, new pair of SL look-alikes. Mr. Willy Wongka, can't do much with the little dilly-dally? Voila! Order an SL-endorsement online and get it on the line.

Good luck there, you saas-bahu (read household melodrama) serial watching ignorant lady of the house!

But Ms. Leone's entry on the scene has its advantages for these women as well. Atleast the cases of marital rape might go down, when the fans get back home all worked and spent watching her in action. Now, that does sound like a win-win.

So in all fairness we can say, Bollywood's sure got its sunny side up this time. 

P.S.: For the uninitiated: Sunny Leone is a U.S. based porn star, of Indian origin, respectfully called Adult movie star here. Recently, a reality T.V. show gave her the crown and the throne in the Indian movie industry. Btw, I have nothing against her. Just that the actors who have really worked their way towards their places, have fallen far behind in popularity( going by the statistics quoted in yesterday's daily), as compared to her. 
And I think I just made her a tad more popular ;P

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